Friday, December 9, 2011

Gratitude

I've been struggling to write this blog.
When I first found out that I was going to be able to attend Joe's "Most private Christmas affair" in Boston with a very dear friend of mine, I wasn't going to write about it at all. I wanted to keep the memories close & hold them tight. I thought that sharing them might tarnish them somehow. However, I realized very quickly that it just doesn't work that way for me. When I feel joy I want to share it. Keeping it all bottled up inside just feels wrong.
I've had so many thoughts swirling around in my head since last week. I keep trying to figure out a way to express how I'm feeling, but words fail me. I've written and erased so many lines today that I've completely lost count. I just couldn't get a good handle on what it was I was trying to express. So I took a break to go get some lunch, and it hit me. GRATITUDE. There's also a lot of pure, unadulterated joy going on.
Ok great. I've narrowed down the emotions. Now what?
Let's start with the music.
I LOVE that Joe made this CD. I really didn't expect to love it this much. It's just Christmas music. Nice, but whatever. It's only good for a few weeks out of the year, right? Yeah.
I think it's pretty clear that I love all of Joe's music. His voice cuts straight to my heart. But this? THIS is special. It's so full of personality it's as if Joe himself turned into a collection of songs and interludes. This was a project born out of passion, not a desire to fill his wallet with more money. (Not saying that wasn't there too...but I'm pretty sure the passion got top billing)
Not everyone will get it, and that's ok...but for those of us who have grown up with Joe, it is a true gift. He just gave us a little bit of his heart. If there is one thing I know for certain about the man, it's that he LIVES for his family. They are his joy. This CD was all about sharing those emotions with anyone willing to listen. Special.
I have lived away from my family for the last 15 years. Because of that, I think Christmas lost a lot of its meaning for me. I forgot what it's like to be with all of the people you love, celebrating life and just enjoying each other.
This last year has been pretty crazy for me. I realized that I had lost my way and I made some enormous changes. I know it sounds a bit mental, but I credit Joe (at least partially) for helping me to find my way again. I won't go into too much detail, but his presence in my life has definitely made a difference.
This summer, my husband, daughter, and I moved back to my home town. I've spent the last several months becoming reacquainted with what it is like to be a family. I found MY joy again.
I guess it's all of these circumstances coming together that made Come Home For Christmas really hit home for me. It moved me in a way I did not expect. It helped me to see my life a little bit more clearly and to gain a better understanding of what is truly important to me. All that in a CD? Yup. Pretty special, huh?

Now, back to Boston.
I knew this show was going to be special. We all did. Everyone wanted to be invited to attend and emotions were running high. Which is one of the reasons I decided to stay quiet about going. I didn't want anything to get in the way of enjoying the evening the way that it was meant to be enjoyed. The idea for these few shows is so beautiful to me. Once again, I am reminded exactly why I am now, and will always be a true blue "Joe girl"...the man just has a beautiful, kind heart. There is no question of ulterior motives here. Love of the music, the fans, the holiday...an attitude of gratitude, and a desire to spread joy. As far as I am concerned, the world is a better place because Joe McIntyre is in it. Period.

There are a lot of things about that evening in Boston that I will remember & cherish for the rest of my life. It was a truly special night spent with really good friends. I don't need to go into detail here. I really do think some things deserve to be kept close. I am tremendously grateful to Joe for giving me an opportunity to spend time with people I love but rarely get to see. I would be a fool if I didn't make sure to include Joe himself in that category.

So I guess really, what I've been trying to say all this time is just a very simple "Thank you"
To everyone reading this- Thank you for your role in my journey. You may not realize on a daily basis that you affect my life, but you do. In a very real way. Your friendship and support are important to me and I hope you know that I never take them lightly.
To Joe- Thank you for never, ever making me feel like I'm just a fan. I could say a lot more, but for once in my life, I'm going to just leave it at that...except to add XOXO

Wishing you all the most joyous holiday season.


Live, Laugh, Love

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